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Readers Respond: What Can You Do if You are a GLBT Teen with a Crush on Someone Straight?

Responses: 863

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It is really common for GLBT teens to have feelings for their friends, but what do you do if you are gay and have a straight crush?

This is a topic that has come up a lot in the community forum. As one teen says,

"I have this crush on this boy. He was really adorable and was a skater...We never really talked except over Myspace, and he claimed to be straight. I just wish that i could have him. But he keeps only going out with chicks. I want him to give me a chance! What should i do?"

Ever been in a similar situation? Share what was it like below!

distance crushes

I have four crushes and all of them are straight. I love them but cant get to them. One has a girlfriend. An other one has my cousin on him. The third and last one are really popular in school. At least one i know has kissed a boy but i dont know if it was because his gay bi or curious. The other i know i shouldnt be around but him and his friends act like boyfriends.
—Guest great its you

Not sure

Im really not to sure on advice to give.. I just recently caught feelings for one of my few guy friends and it's BEYOND wierd for me.... He's completely different than most guys and actually cares about everything I say... He makes me laugh so hard and I make him laugh... We have inside jokes that only me and him get and hurts me to know that if I told him my feelings he could possibly end our friendship... The wierd thing is that he knows that I'm gay and it doesn't bother him at all he never even mentions it... I know it may sound wierd but I've literally dreamed about him... I know that if he gave me a chance I would give him my all... But should I ask for that chance?
—Guest Kd

yup. happening at the moment.

so there is this guy that i really like! im just gonna call him "e" for now instead of his full name. so, he is definitely straight and likes one of my friends. i can't seem to get over him, either. the person i liked before him used to be just a crush, but "e" seems like so much more. what to do!!!!!!
—Guest ilyea

I want to know

Im gay and theres this guy in my class and i never really noticed him until i noticed he would take small subtle glances i thought nothing of it until my friend mentioned she would see him stare at me as i would turn something in to the teacher then wlk back. We dont reaally talk but he does listen when i talk to my friend and i listen to him when he talks. But i dont know what his sexual orientation is, and now thinking about it hes everything i would want in a boyfriend and my friends tell me to talk to him since theres only one week of school left. But i just dont wonna get emotionally attached to someone because i have no clue if he will like me back. Should i just give up? Or should i ask him if he's gay and then get to know him? Im just so confused if i should be thinking about him at all.
—Guest Guest confused as eff!

I want to know

Im gay and theres this guy in my class and i never really noticed him until i noticed he would take small subtle glances i thought nothing of it until my friend mentioned she would see him stare at me as i would turn something in to the teacher then wlk back. We dont reaally talk but he does listen when i talk to my friend and i listen to him when he talks. But i dont know what his sexual orientation is, and now thinking about it hes everything i would want in a boyfriend and my friends tell me to talk to him since theres only one week of school left. But i just dont wonna get emotionally attached to someone because i have no clue if he will like me back. Should i just give up? Or should i ask him if he's gay and then get to know him? Im just so confused if i should be thinking about him at all.
—Guest Guest confused as eff!

Bi crush

I like mult. Guys & girls at my school, there so cute but its hard to be with. I want boyfriend first, cause I dated 2 chicks the past 2 years. So I want experience dating guy. I having difficulties to make the first move. Any tips?
—Guest C

Same situation

Im 13 and there is this guy- he is so cute! Whenever we get changed in P.E, i look at him and get a boner. And I always wank to his picturd on facebook... But the problem is, he alwaystalks about girls and boobs. I really love him! P.S. Im a guy :P
—Guest iLikeCookies

Told him only to regret it

I told my friend how I felt about him. At first he thought I was lying, but I told that I was being serious so he then believed me. Afterwards he told that nothings change we're still bros and friends. That same day after I told him my feelings he was talking to me about all these two girls that agreed to do "stuff" with him. Nothing like salt on the wounds huh? But I can feel that he's not really my friend anymore we used to talk all the time now it's rare if texts me. Someone told me if I told him I'd feel relieved but thats not the story I just feel like crap. Well to get to the bottom of this I still like him.
—Guest Cris

My story

I'm a 14yo guy who is very much gay although have not told anyone. Coming out isn't my problem, my community is extremely excepting of gays and I have been brought up by two mums in a lesbian family. My problem is my huge crush on my best friends boyfriend. I feel terrible and as I write this I feel terrible because he's in a relationship with my best friend but whenever I'm around him I just feel complete and he makes me feel amazing. He's very handsy and I play along with it. He grabs my hand sometimes and puts it against his crotch. He's just so amazing words cannot express. It feels like nobody else could possibly feel the love I have at the moment. Anyway all that aside, the hugging the flirting there's so many things to suggest he's straight. He's made out with his gf 4times and when I went over to his place he told me he watches lesbian porn and that he thinks it's hot. I was so upset and honestly have no idea what to do. It's all just so confusing :/ But I know that I am gay.
—Guest Salidspread76

Confused

I"ve always been straight but one day I met this kid at my busstop and he is my age and I felt funny. Today I have a huge crush on him and he hangs out with me all of the time. Sometimes I catch him staring at me when I walk down the street not like a creeper but kinda like he is interested and when I look back he smiles at me. When we have conversations I make hints about being Bi or ever liking dudes and he doesn't answer but casually turns away. I've invited him to come over to talk because there are lots of chillins' at our busstop and I want private conversation but he says no. I want him so bad he is so hot and I can't help but think about him. He is also so sweet he says bye to me all of the time and invites me to parties but...
—Guest Why do you need to know

He found out! :(

I am a 15 year old guy. I really love one of my friends and he found out I was the one putting love notes in his lock and now he is uncomfortable around me. It hurts to be around him. He is a 17 year old junior and I am a 15 year old freshman. He is so sexy he drives me crazy I would do anything for him. He has a girlfriend but I don't know if he is just putting on an act to hide his gayness or bisexualness or what, because he's a really good actor he is in theatre arts but so am I we just have different class periods. I've seen him act he is amazing. He had to play a girl for a beauty pageant and h did so good at it. What do I do why can't he just come out the closet already I know he's bi or gay!!!??? :( :( :( At least we still talk.
—Guest Falls in love easily

My bestfriends str8 I like him alot

Try to talk him in to having sex with you some how.
—Guest Answer to guest wantsgaystuff

not sure if friend is bi

im 16 and i definitely like boys but im not entirely sure if i like girls. anyway i go to an all guys school and some of my friends are so hot it is ridiculous. one of my soccer friends is especially hot and he was actually the first friend i made when i went to high school. he is one of those people who acts kinda gay but you can never be sure if he really is. hes not one of my best friends so i dont know if i trust him enough to tell him i have a crush on him because if he told one person the whole damn school would know. i have been trying to become better friends with him so i can decide if i trust him or not. one night we went to a party and got drunk so we both couldnt drive home. we decided to sleep in the back of my car and go home in the morning. i wanted to tell him i was gay so bad that night but it would have been way too awkward if he wasnt gay. it's so damn scary to tell someone who might be straight that you are bi because if hes not and tells everyone you are screwed!!
—Guest ughhh

Keep your head up.

So a couple of days ago I went on a feild trip, oh ya I'm a 13yr gay, but any way when we had lunch this guy from another school keep staring at me, I thought nothing of it, but then when I walked over to the washroom he followed me and told me how much he wanted me, long story short, we made out for like 20 minutes, so you never know when or where love will find you;)
—Guest Very surprised

Can't wait any longer.

Ok,so I'm a 13 year old male, and for about a month I had a crush on this guy, a friend, except, he's been a friend for ever and I know he's straight, I got over him , but then about a week ago. Went on a field trip and there was this really cute guy and I didn't say one word to him the whole time and when we were leaveing he walked up to me and gave me a peace of paper,with his e-mail on it, what does that mean, is he gay or bi and like me? It won't matter though cause I'll never see him again. Should I e-mail him?
—Guest Lost in his eyes

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