GLBT issues didn't simply emerge yesterday, but it can be easy to forget about things that happened this week, let alone almost 40 years ago. And while the GLBT community still faces huge obstacles, remembering the past can help us appreciate the present.

See what you know about a few key events in modern GLBT history by taking the Back in the Day quiz.

When it comes to sex, I think I am pretty open-minded. My general philosophy is, if it's isn't hurting anyone and both parties are consenting, then what people do is there own business.

That pretty much goes double for someone's fantasy life. Sexual fantasies are a normal way to explore sexual feelings.

Still just because it is perfectly healthy to have sexual fantasies, that doesn't mean that some fantasies are without issue.

One that comes up a lot is the straight male "lesbian" sex fantasy. So what's the problem? Fantasies are safe and healthy, right? Of course. The concern is that this fantasy contributes to the sexualization of lesbians in a way that is less about lesbian sexuality than it is about catering to straight male desire.

I mean, despite the "girl-on-girl" nature of the fantasy, the woman being fantasized about is rarely actually a lesbian (if she was, the straight guy doing the fantasizing probably wouldn't have a really big role in the scenario), and her enjoyment is typically less important than what the scene looks like.

The other problem with the lesbian fantasy is that it contributes to situations where girls who may or may not identify as lesbian or bisexual hook-up, less because they are into each other, and more because the guys they are with think that doing so is hot. This can set up an encounter where girls may be doing things that they aren't comfortable with, or that they don't find satisfying, because they think it will make them seem wild or daring or just because they are pressured into doing so.

Are lesbian sex fantasies the end of the world? Are straight girl hook-ups? Of course not. In fact, some might argue that the cultural acceptance of same sex female sexuality can be seen as a step towards greater GLBT acceptance. And though I would hesitate to buy that argument until gay male fantasies are seen in the same way, I also don't ever want to tell people that there is something wrong with their turn-ons. At the same time, I do think it is important to acknowledge some of the issues the lesbian fantasy raises!

What do you think? Are "lesbian" fantasies problematic? No big deal? Can they be positive?

Read more...

If a Girl Kisses Another Girl Does That Means She's Lesbian or Bi?
• What Do You Think of Katy Perry's Song, "I Kissed a Girl?"
• Gay and Lesbian Teens Talk About Sex

An article published in the July issue of Pediatrics reports that teens who think they will die young are more likely to engage in risky behavior like using drugs, attempting suicide, getting arrested or having unprotected sex.

As the paper states, "Adolescents' perceived risk for early death predicted serious health outcomes, notably a diagnosis of HIV/AIDS in young adulthood."

These findings dispel a common myth, namely that teens take risks because they think they are invincible, when, in fact, a lot are taking risks for just the opposite reason!

What do you think of these findings? Does the study ring true for you?

July 4th marks America's Independence Day. And while gaining independence from parents isn't exactly the same as gaining it for a country, it seems like a good time to discuss the topic of teen autonomy.

For GLBT teens a lack of independence can make things like meeting other GLBT kids, finding information online, and even seeing a doctor, really challenging. This can happen when a teen doesn't want to come out to a parent. It can also happen when a parent knows, or suspects, that a teen is gay and mistakenly thinks that withholding information about GLBT life will somehow "straighten" their child out. As a result, some gay teens find themselves sneaking around behind their parents backs--usually, without great results.

There aren't always perfect solutions to gaining independence, but here are some things to keep in mind:

• Be responsible. Prove that your parents can trust you. Be where you say you will be. Call when you say you will. Come home on time. The more trust you build with your parents, the more flexible they will feel comfortable being.
• Challenge, don't attack. If your parents make completely unreasonable rules, for example that you can't join a club for GLBT teens at school, or hang out with a gay friend, it can be really tempting to scream and yell. It's unlikely that this will get you the results you are hoping for. Try, try, try to remain calm. Think about what you want to say before you say it. Ask your parents to explain their decisions. If they refuse to have a rational conversation, think about a supportive adult whose opinion they might value. It may be to your benefit to enlist that person’s help when having a conversation.
• Compromise. If your parents want you home by 9, but you want to stay out until midnight, then you might want to suggest a compromise. Ask if they will allow you to stay out later if you have a good reason to do so. For example, a movie that gets out at 9:30, or a school event. Giving them a CONCRETE reason will help you see results faster than if they think you just want to hang out on a street corner.
• Choose your battles. Look, if you wanted to you could fight about anything under the sun. But it is often wise to focus on issues that you care the most about. If your parents see that you are passionate about something specific, and don’t just think you are being argumentative, getting your way is a lot more likely.

Do you think you have enough independence? If you had more freedom, what would you do with it?