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"My First Bra:" A Lesbian Teen's Story

A Lesbian Teen Discusses This Common Puberty Experience

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Ask grown-up women what some of the defining moments of early puberty were for them and chances are you'll hear things like, "getting my period for the first time," or "getting my first bra."

But how we feel about these experiences will be affected by everything from our body image to our feelings about our sexual orientation and gender identity, and even our personalities.

For some of us the changes of puberty are distressing. For others thrilling. And a few of us are even able to find the whole thing kind of amusing.

Jade, a 14-year-old lesbian who describes her style as a mix of indie and androgynous, recalls how the first time she went bra shopping provided a bit of an unwelcome reality check. As she says:

"I remember that dreadful day when i had to get my first bra. I was a chubby kid and therefore, hated trying on clothes, especially something to hold the lumps of flesh on my chest. I remember the bra straps...ugh! They were so uncomfortable, like it was a friggin harness and it felt so...girly, like there was no turning back now: "you're officially a girl and from now on you'll have to fulfill your role as a woman by wearing dresses, gossiping, and magically giving birth to children in the future." Before it came time for me to venture into the world of puberty, I had to be exposed to what would come. I was literally surrounded by "naked" women mannequins wearing bras and panties and other lingerie. I had so many thoughts going on in my head like,
  1. THESE THINGS ON MY CHEST ARE GOING TO GET BIGGER????!!
  2. Those mannequin women are super pretty...
  3. Am I blushing from staring at them for so long?
Then I found out that my body was going to start leaking fluids [menstruating] later on and that babies didn't come from sticking a pumpkin seed into your belly button..."

Like Jade, a lot of lesbian teens have complicated feelings about puberty. Some might be excited to see their bodies maturing. Others might feel embarrassed or uncomfortable about the changes that are taking place. Lesbian girls who aren't comfortable with a feminine body may see things like growing breasts or getting their periods as a sign that their bodies are moving farther and farther from a body they feel reflects their identity. If you are feeling this way, it could be a really good idea to talk about it with someone you trust. But however you are feeling, remember, you sure aren't alone!

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