What are you supposed to do when you're 15, gay, and the most homophobic person on the face of the planet is your older brother? If it wasn't for him going to the same high school, I'd be totally out right now (at least I hope). I need some advice: If coming out to friends eventually reaches the rest of the school and gets back to my brother, would it be worth it if/when he tried to beat the crap out of me?
Here is some advice from another teen:
"That's really tough, my advice would be to come out to a close friend that you trust not to tell anyone else, and maybe talk it over with them if they'll have more of an idea of what your brother is like than we do. I think it'd be much better for you to tell him yourself than to let him find out through rumors at school but I think telling a few close friends who you can trust would help build your confidence for telling your brother."
Here's my advice:
The desire to come out can be a really strong one. But it is very important to put your safety first. If you think that your brother might physically hurt you, or might make your life really unpleasant at home, at school or at both, then you might want to hold off until he is out of the house.
That being said, he very well might be "all talk." Does he know any gay people? Could he be trying to see macho or tough? Is he open-minded about other things? It might be impossible to know the answers to these questions, but think about them before you decide whether or not to tell him you are gay.
Another thing you should think about is how your parents might react. Hopefully, they would not only be supportive, but would be able to intervene on your behalf if your brother reacts badly.
Whatever you decide about your brother, it would be really wise to find someone you can trust to talk to about these issues!
