Is There a Problem with "Lesbian" Sex Fantasies?
When it comes to sex, I think I am pretty open-minded. My general philosophy is, if it's isn't hurting anyone and both parties are consenting, then what people do is there own business.
That pretty much goes double for someone's fantasy life. Sexual fantasies are a normal way to explore sexual feelings.
Still just because it is perfectly healthy to have sexual fantasies, that doesn't mean that some fantasies are without issue.
One that comes up a lot is the straight male "lesbian" sex fantasy. So what's the problem? Fantasies are safe and healthy, right? Of course. The concern is that this fantasy contributes to the sexualization of lesbians in a way that is less about lesbian sexuality than it is about catering to straight male desire.
I mean, despite the "girl-on-girl" nature of the fantasy, the woman being fantasized about is rarely actually a lesbian (if she was, the straight guy doing the fantasizing probably wouldn't have a really big role in the scenario), and her enjoyment is typically less important than what the scene looks like.
The other problem with the lesbian fantasy is that it contributes to situations where girls who may or may not identify as lesbian or bisexual hook-up, less because they are into each other, and more because the guys they are with think that doing so is hot. This can set up an encounter where girls may be doing things that they aren't comfortable with, or that they don't find satisfying, because they think it will make them seem wild or daring or just because they are pressured into doing so.
Are lesbian sex fantasies the end of the world? Are straight girl hook-ups? Of course not. In fact, some might argue that the cultural acceptance of same sex female sexuality can be seen as a step towards greater GLBT acceptance. And though I would hesitate to buy that argument until gay male fantasies are seen in the same way, I also don't ever want to tell people that there is something wrong with their turn-ons. At the same time, I do think it is important to acknowledge some of the issues the lesbian fantasy raises!
What do you think? Are "lesbian" fantasies problematic? No big deal? Can they be positive?
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